#106 - replace one with another

man is this valentine's day gonna suck. usually for valentine's day i try to do something nice for myself. well, since i never ever have a date for the vday i HAVE to do something nice for myself. so i take the money that i would've spent on my vday girl and buy myself something that normally i wouldn't indulge in. one year i bought a damn cool watch for myself. last year i think it was a cross necklace. i don't know what to do this year. i thought that i might actually get to have a valentine's day with a girl to be my valentine, but that didn't work out, vday came a couple of weeks too late.

so what now? hmm... i'm not looking forward to thursday.

i think i've gotta give myself something to dive into... fill everyday with activity and no wasted time. have something to look forward to everyday. well, i've got my workout routine, i can keep that going strong, and even add to it now since i've got so much time, so maybe we can do:

Mon: weight training after work, vball at night
Tues: run the dog or tennis after work, yoga at night
Wed: weight training after work, vball at night
Thurs: either yoga or vball at night
Fri: weight training after work
Sat: surfing and/or tennis
Sun: surfing and/or tennis

i write every active or exercise related thing i do on my calendar in green, so as long as i've got something green on my calendar each day i should be good. make use of all the free time i've got now. see? i can get excited about something.

oh, another thing i'm getting excited about... american idol was good tonight, i actually like some of the people already. i'm gonna root for that unilateral vocal fold paralysis guy 'cause i'm a dork with speech path on the brain. and maybe that ditzy curly haired blond girl.

plus... brandi's got a list of her favorite songs for the moment on the side of her blog, cool idea... i'm gonna steal it! haha, but my current music playlist is absolutely tied in to how i'm feeling at the moment so just in case you were wondering how i'm feeling right now, just take a look at the list and you'll get a real nice idea (because i'm sure you're all sitting at your computer going, "i wonder how matt feels right now?"). right. anyway, they're cool songs, check 'em out.

#104 - the starting line

anyone heard of the starting line? probably not, although you may have heard "the best of me," it used to play on the radio sometime maybe like when we were seniors in high school (1999)? i think it just might be my favorite song of all time. i don't know a whole lot of other songs they sing... i've heard a bunch, but none really caught my attention all that much. but they're all on my pandora.com that i listen to at work anyway.

but, they're coming to hawai'i! woo hoo! hardly anyone i know ever comes here for concerts. i only found out about it a couple of day ago though, and the concert is in two weeks already. it's at pipeline, so not a sit-down concert, which is cool, but it's also an all-ages show, which is not so ideal... still, could be very fun! i'm still looking for people to go with because it's on a tuesday (feb. 19th) and not a lot of people have even heard of them... it's times like these i wish i wasn't single so i could drag my girl along with me, but i'm an idiot and went and ended that so i'll have to suffer the consequences for that... then again, it's not like she would've come along anyway so i guess i'm not missing out on anything, ha...

well, if anyone out there who reads this (which is like, only brandi, but she's in oregon) and wants to go see them with me, hit me up!

#30 - renewal

on a more serious note...

this past weekend was easter, a very cool four days of church. no really, mass of the Lord's supper on thursday, the passion of the Lord on friday, easter vigil on saturday, and easter sunday of course on sunday. before grad school i wasn't all that excited about going to church, but it seems like once it was my choice completely to go, it became so much more meaningful. anyway, i didn't get to go to all of the masses this year, so i'm kinda bummed about that, but it's not so much about attending services as it is about the new spiritual year. six weeks before this was the lenten season, another aspect i didn't appreciate until grad school (seems like a lot of this happened around that time because 1) grad school was crap and it was a tough time so that led me back, and 2) around the ages of 21-23 is when your prefrontal lobe becomes firmly established, up until then it was still growing and changing, therefore, the person that you are and the personality that you have at the age of 23 is most likely who you will be for the rest of your life, unless you have a tbi (traumatic brain injury) or some other neurologically altering condition, haha).

traditionally lent is about sacrifice and almsgiving and all that, but growing up all i knew it meant was: gotta give up something i like. usually it was french fries, or candy or something (in fact, one year during or right before high school i gave up candy, and after that, and to this day, i hardly eat any candy anymore, unless it's a situation where it'd be rude to refuse or something like that... except for small chocolate mints... like andes chocolate mints. one year i gave up alcohol... but even though that was a tough sacrifice (and i gave all the money that i would have spent on alcohol to donations), it really didn't do much spiritually for me. so this year instead of giving something up, i decided to make myself a promise, be nicer to the family and engage in conversation with them.

boy that was tough... if you don't quite understand my situation, since moving back home during grad school i've been keeping myself independent and since we don't all have very much in common (and they irritate me constantly!) i've been keeping a short relationship with my family. so i think that was a good thing to do, and as it turns out, during lent i found out that i would be moving out at the end of the year, so it was really good timing to try and mend some of those relationships before i really separate myself from them.

anyway, flash forward to the day after easter and i really thank the Lord for the strength He gave me to keep my lenten promise, because now i don't have to think about when to make conversation with the family, it happens more naturally and i don't have the short temper with them that i used to. so... easter, new religious calendar year, a time for renewal. renewal's looking good this year. but why is it that it takes things like this to instigate renewal? why is it so difficult for me to keep constant and vigilant in my faith and how my faith guides my life? well, that's the human in me, but i'll keep praying for the strength to overcome that.

hey, here's a nice renewal song from relient k's new album that i listen to constantly, if you haven't heard of them yet, man, the lyrics hit me, y'know when you find those songs that you think, "man, that song could've been written just for me." it's like that with all their songs, which doesn't mean that they're in tune with my life and thoughts and i can channel it through them, nope, it just means that everyone goes through these things, and everyone has these thoughts at one time or another, so look around you and we're all so much alike, and we can all help each other because we know how each other can feel. start off with a positive thought tomorrow and see how much nicer the rest of the day becomes.

"up and up"

yesterday was not quite what it could have been. as were most of all the days before. but i swear today with every breath i'm breathing in. i'll be trying to make it so much more // cause it seems i get so hung up on. the history of what's gone wrong. that the hope of a new day is sometimes hard to see. but i'm finally catching on to it. yeah the past is just a conduit. and the light there at the end is where i'll be.

#24 - kick start to spring break

whoa, long time since my last post, and TONS happened since as well... it's hard to write everything in a little blog like this (and convey the same kind of excitement that the news brought in real life), so i'll just list everything that's happened, and you can let your excitement build within you... ha.

1. last thursday and friday i went to my annual work convention at ala moana. i don't care too much for going to these things (well, just because our state convention is pretty dinky and generic), but i do like to listen to speakers who have absolutely NOTHING to do with my job. haha, okay so speech path is a very broad field, and although i work with the kiddies, my original interest in the field was adult neurogenics (like post-stroke, tbi, dementia, cancer patients, etc.). unfortunately, the demands on working life (and, consequently, non-working life) for the medical/private practice field are completely beyond my aspirations... therefore, i have compromised by getting a job where working life and non-working life are very nicely balanced. not that kids aren't interesting (because for the most part they act like either tbi or dementia patients anyway), but academically and intellectually, i LOVE neuroscience. so everytime i see my old professor at these things she asks, "when are you gonna get your ph.d. already?" and i've gotta say something like, "i'm still too close outta school, gotta decompress a bit." but really, i have absolutely no desire or ambition to get a ph.d. although studying neuroscience would kinda rock... i have no ambition for research, or writing a thesis, or anything. so i'm content to just spark up that intellectual interest whenever a neuro-kid comes along, or whenever i get to listen to a speaker like this at a convention.

so our speaker was pretty cool, he had a neat indian accent, and it was all neuroanatomy, physiology, and neuro-imaging (all of which i could listen to all day). not too practical for my working purposes... but it's all stuff i learned in grad school anyway so it's good to be able to exercise that part of my brain every year or so so that i don't forget all that great stuff. maybe one day i'll use it...

2. the BIGGEST news.... I GOT THE PLACE! i'm in total shock. those guys who reserved the townhouse unit in front of me (re: lottery post about a month ago) backed out so.... i'm moving out! it's pretty sweet, and moving very very fast... i meet with the mortgage officer, signed my sales contract, and i'm already having to look at upgrade options and kitchen cabinets and whatever. whew.. i'm glad that they won't be finished with construction until december though... because i'm not ready to move out yet, but give me another 9 months to get myself together and i'll be good to go. well, lots to think about right now, and i can't convey it all in writing, so i'll leave it at that... oh, by the way, it's unit #2704.

3. my relient k cd finally came in! woo hoo! i haven't finished listening to the whole thing yet, but i'm liking what i hear.

4. went surfing today at haleiwa, man it was frickin' freezing! but real clean, nice... and the weather was pretty good, a bit too windy, but bright clear sun and all. i'm loving this spring break thing.

ps - the pic up there is from zak noyle, it's called "waianae wall," i'm thinking that needs to go in my new place

#22 - jake and rimi

so as always after my american idol posts i have to go and listen to some real music because i feel guilty about indulging in so much pop culture, haha. so let me share with you someone you've heard of a lot and someone who you've probably never heard of at all.

first up is jake shimabukuro... i love this guy's music. so creative. plus lightning fast on that 'uke which is way cool, i got his latest album "gently weeps," very good, i recommend it highly.

the second is rimi natsukawa, you've probably never heard of her because she's a japanese singer, actually from okinawa and sings japanese contemporary with a little bit of a traditional enka or okinawan twist... anyway, i think she's got just about the purest voice i've ever heard... take a listen to this song (and don't mind the hand motions, i think she's singing a baby lullaby or something weird like that):



and as a bonus... here's jake and rimi with KONISHIKI!!! weird... but not bad (ps - check out the clarinet chorus they got going on):

#19 - interlude

while i'm waiting on my relient k cd to come in the mail (darn domestic shipping), i'll tell you a little bit about the last cd i bought... don't laugh. yeah, i bought the justin timberlake cd, but wait, let me defend myself. i'd been hearing those first two singles on the radio forever and darn it if they don't get stuck in your head. so i was gonna just buy it for 99 cents on itunes but then itunes was being a punk so i decided to just go be a consumer and buy the real cd. but here's the thing, it ain't bad. haha. well, the songs are damn catchy, and although there are a couple that are kinda like the nsync throw-backs that i thought the whole cd would have, most of the songs are actually a bit original sounding. the title track is actually not too shabby and i'm liking "lovestoned" right now.

anyway, another random thought... go see "my super ex-girlfriend." haha, a dumb movie yeah, but i love it when shows take really over-the-top concepts and make them real mundane. i think that's why i liked buffy the vampire slayer so much and can't stand to watch all those high-drama shows like "24" or whatever. too much drama, everyone needs to calm down. anyway, definately go see that movie, my favorite line?

"why did g-girl throw a shark at us?"



**EDIT** - i completely forgot to mention that the reason why i bought the whole cd (and not just a couple of songs) is that in between the songs there are little remixes to conclude the song or prelude into the next song, which is pretty darn cool. anyway, i'm almost tempted to think that justin timberlake might be kinda cool... what the heck is wrong with me!?! who am i, joseph? how embarrassing...

#13 - waiting on the mail to come

waiting for march 6th... the new album by relient k comes out. at first i was gonna rush out and buy it on tuesday morning for that instant gratification, but i kept getting presale emails for the past few weeks and i just couldn't hold out any longer (they kept offering better and better freebies, what could i do?) so i pre-ordered it online. which is good, but the mail... oh the mail. i've been screwed by the mail oh so many times. i was even gonna rush mail it, but that wasn't even an option to hawaii. oh well, i'll just have to trust that "domestic shipping" delivers it on time... crossing fingers. but until then... previews on myspace are awesome. haha.

#10 - jason mraz

okay, i was gonna save this post for later, but since that guy sang one of his songs on idol tonight i thought i'd post it today. so, here's my second favorite artist: jason mraz. why do i like his stuff? hmm... well, not quite the same reasons as my #1 pick (re: relient k), not so much for the lyrics or emotional tone of his songs, but he's just a great singer. really free... smooth. if i could sing at all, i'd probably pick this guy to emulate. of course, i don't like all his stuff (that's why he's #2 on the list), but i love all his acoustic stuff. the versions with just him, a guitar, some hand drums, and maybe a jazz flute or something. that's the best stuff (e.g. "no doubling back" or "unfold" the live "coffee house" versions). but he can do good stuff with orchestration too (e.g. "please don't tell her" and "plane" from his most recent album).

as for the song that american idol guy sang... not a great example of why i like jason mraz. you've probably never heard the songs that i really like from him, but if you ever do it's just really free flowing music. awesome. if you get a chance check out some of his stuff, here are some of my suggestions:

- unfold - probably my fave of his, but the live acoustic version, vocals are great, simple kind of song, but it's got a lot in it
- no doubling back - very close second favorite, but then again, only the live acoustic version, there's so much more music when there's only three instruments playing y'know?
- you and i both - for a more mainstream type song, this one is pretty good, also check the acoustic version of this one though
- bella luna - on his newest album, i love the tempo and easiness of this song, very clean and clear

on an unrelated note.... things that are pissing me off right now:

1. mosquito bites
2. knowing i'm not going to get my 8 hours of sleep tonight
3. itunes - nevermind that it's a damn greedy SOB trying to take all my money and monopolize my music playing options (i refuse to get an ipod for this very reason... also i don't like those buttons), but i've got it installed on my computer and crappin' thing keeps skipping! what the crap! i paid for these songs and i'm damn sure i didn't pay for it to skip every 20 seconds. grr... does anyone else have this problem? is it connected to the internet? maybe it's my wireless connection that's funking it up? i don't know but it's making me angry...

3, 2, 1.... 1, 2, 3.... what the heck.... is bothering me...

grr...

#7 - i need you

bleh... i felt kinda dirty after those two american idol posts in a row, so here's some real music: my first music post will, of course, be relient k. much thanks to mike and jeremy for introducing me to this band in the first place, cause since that time they've been my favorite artist hands down. there's not one song by them that i don't absolutely love. why do i like their music? melodies and harmonies are intricate, creative. it's the little things that really add to the sounds, one bar here and there that makes their music interesting. lyrics are wonderful, not only creative, but they use a full set of vocabulary. haha, that sounds weird but y'know when you listen to the radio i bet you normally hear maybe the same 1000 words or so over and over again. now i'm not saying that you've got to squeeze those $1.00 words into each song, but don't be shy about using multisyllabic words when they're appropriate. or wonderfully random. and what's more, they use those words without altering accepted english stress patterns (this is where the linguist in me comes out) and really keeping the phrases aurally pleasing. plus they make use of all the notes in their melodies (y'know how you can tell when someone's written a song with a few words dragged out and you can tell that they had to stretch the words to match the notes... not so with this band, they make full use of every note). plus their lyrics are just fun to sing.

okay, blah blah blah, right, but the main reason why they're my favorite is because their songs seem to hit all the right emotions for me. everything, the sounds, words, silence, and instrumentation just work together. can't really explain good music, but they are definately the best. i just heard their new song, "i need you." those are three very powerful words in song, they work very well in just about any song. i'd put those words in my song, if i had any talent to make songs and then if i wanted to make a song about needing someone. anyway, go check it out, i've got it playing on my myspace page (click link on the right). can't wait until March 6th, their new album comes out, i've got sneak peeks at four songs and i love them all already:

Five Score and Seven Years Ago:

1. Plead the Fifth
2. Come Right Out and Say It
3. I Need You
4. The Best Thing
5. Forgiven
6. Must Have Done Something Right
7. Give
8. Devastation and Reform
9. I'm Taking You With Me
10. Faking My Own Suicide
11. Crayons Can Melt On Us For All I Care
12. Bite My Tongue
13. Up and Up
14. Deathbed